Cardinal Cross Confession

As I do my best to help and work with clients, family and friends on how the current Astrological weather is manifesting for them, I am naturally also dealing with this Cardinal Cross energy in my own chart and it's pulling focus into all four major corners of my life. From my personal drive & identity, relationships & marriage, home & family, to work direction & career purpose; it all seems to be in transition to various degrees. Astrologers may be on the tip of what is happening in the skies, but we are certainly not immune from experiencing it.  

{For Astrology knowledge buffs who want the details} Specifically, it's on my Cancer/Capricorn Ascendant/Descendant axis, which is 1st house of identity and opposite 7th house of relationships. Libra is intercepted in my 4th house of home/family opposite Aries intercepted in my 10th of career/life purpose. This is how the Grand Cross lands for me, not to mention some other aspects this fun configuration is making to my chart. It's quite a doozy of a transit for everyone, and I am simply no exception.

I am doing my best to work with it very consciously, however, I have my extreme moments of deep struggle too.  The way that this manifests for me is a continual vacillation and balancing between feeling I am confidently and constructively handling the daily challenges to grow, change, evolve and succeed and then feeling completely frustrated, confused and overwhelmed. It literally can change in an instant. I also find that the position and sign the moon is in can influence the days profoundly. 

Another part of my continuing vacillation is going back and forth in discovering what is truly my issue and what is coming from or being influenced by another? What is my crap and what is theirs essentially. I feel I am being forced to redefine my line between partner/friend/family and client/colleague/career. This line has perhaps become blurred for me, so I must consciously remember who is who and how I behave with each. If you are a counselor, healer or light worker of any kind I'm sure you go through this as well. When your desire to help is so strong and the knowing that we are each on our own journey and you simply cannot help everyone is also understood, you feel helpless and stuck sometimes. And as an Astrologer, it really sucks when even with the knowledge of what's happening in your own chart, you're so close to it, you don't know how to help yourself! This is when you call on another Astrologer for some objective insight.

And speaking of stuck, I had a new thought about this Cardinal Cross last night. With four squares or  90 degree right angles, it creates a box right? Anyone feeling a bit boxed in or stuck at a complete impasse? I do. And cardinal energy is about action and movement, so this in NOT comfortable at all. I know I have already been feeling quite unsettled, so who knows how the peak and waning of this Astrological event will feel. 

I think the biggest challenge for all of us is the uncertainly and fears that come with trying to grow and change while having faith in ourselves and the journey without always, if ever, getting any confirmation, in the way we might want, to support that we're even on the right path. 

My friend text me one day and asked what was going on because she was ready to blow up and when I reminder her and told her to hang in there, she was less than helped by my advice. Her response was exactly, "whatever"...because she's been hearing it from me for so long.

And we have all been dealing with the intensity of recent powerful Astrological energies for so long it felt like a very appropriate response. So when I said, "then why did you ask?" and she said "I don't know", I replied with this; "it's because you know and believe that there are things always working around us that cannot be seen or often fully understood in the moment, but only felt...for better or for worse. Glass half empty or glass half full, you choose." And even after that I got, "blah, blah, blah.." 

I had to laugh because I myself was having a day when I felt like I could also explode and I was talking myself through each negative thought that came in and trying to redirect it more clearly to avoid unnecessary conflict in my own world.

So I get it! Awareness may be key in living consciously and instrumental in moving through life at a higher vibration to creating more confidence, joy, success and love....but it is NOT easy, continuous or even fun. And we often fail. And how could we not, we are after all human. And I have certainly failed more times than I have succeeded at anything in my life. But that's okay, because I have always learned something from it and that is always my ultimate goal. So I realize staying 'conscious, aware and awake' takes commitment, dedication and continuous effort. Huh? Oh, wait a minute, doesn't that sound like the ingredients you would need to make any good life or personal dream a reality? Something to think about.

But even with the knowing of how difficult any conscious approach can be and my own experiences of pain and challenge, I still can't shake my desire to do it.

Whether it's Astrology, Angels, God, Tarot, Spirit Guides or whatever other mystical means of support I choose, I see them all as priceless tools for assistance in everything; from getting through the daily grind, to understanding my own triggers, connecting with my own power and creating a life of love and abundance. But more importantly, I think it reminds me continuously just how small and insignificant I am while at the same time reminding me that I am a part of something much bigger than this life I am currently living. So I do my best to trust in the divine design of what's beyond my own vision, reality, awareness or full understanding and work to contribute positively and live up to my highest potential in this life. That means also honoring the moments when I am struggling to find the answers and am full of doubt. Nevertheless, because I have also gained priceless understanding and experienced as many blessings as I have troubles, my faith in the Beyond continues.  

Whatever we all choose to do to get through this life, the bottom line is you DO have a choice what tools you use or to choose to use any at all. And with all the different schools of thought, religious or spiritual beliefs, mystical mantras and other philosophies and occult wisdom's out there to choose from to support your journey, they all have one thing in common. Believing with-OUT seeing or knowing for sure and inspiring us to find what we need with-IN. Yes, this is the trick right? This is the Duality!

So as the Full Moon Lunar Eclipse wanes and the Cardinal Cross pushes in, as much as I feel the pressure building, I actually still feel pretty good. I see the challenges in my life clearly and I realize I am the only one holding myself back. I have been asking the 'big questions' for quite a few years now and I must remind myself that once you embark on this path of asking, you can never really stop. And it takes commitment and endurance to always want to discover and achieve more.

This Cardinal Cross is a cross to bear, but it is also simply another powerful opportunity for us to grow collectively and individually. I hope we can all rise to the occasion! 

For you well Being!

If you'd care to share your stories about how the current Astrological weather is affecting you, I'd love to hear. However, if not, I understand that this is also a very personal journey for each of us and I wish you the very best in your journey.

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Thanks for reading and letting me share.

Dominique